Living, reading, writing and working in Kansas, I have upcoming appearances in Tales of the Talisman, Aoife's Kiss, and Scifaikuest. So far my nearest brush with success was an honorable mention for poetry in the 18th Annual Best of Fantasy and Horror. I have several major projects in the works so keep watching!

As writers of speculative fiction our job is to tell a story that transports the reader to a new and exciting place. To accomplish this, we must establish a relationship of trust and, more exigently, arouse the reader’s curiosity as to what will happen next.

As writers, we have only one tool to accomplish this: language.

In his book, The Death of Metaphor, Desmond Egan-- one of Ireland’s greatest contemporary poets-- laments the decline of English prose, decrying it as ‘decadent and lazy’. Egan points his finger directly at the tendency of modern writers to replace transitive verbs with the verb ‘to be’ as the greatest cause of this decline.

The English language, he contends, by overuse of the verb ‘to be’, has grown complacent and lackluster.

“Bring back the transitive verbs!” Egan demands.

We would do well to listen. In reference to verbs, the terms active (transitive) and passive describe the relationship between the subject (the actor/agent in the sentence) and the verb (what the actor/agent does), and the two terms mean exactly what they say. Passive verbs tend to obscure ownership or authorship of the event (the verb); whereas transitive verbs tend towards distinction and action-- the subject is doing something.

The following represent the most common derivations of the passive verb ‘to be’: am, is, are, was, were, be, been, being, and become.

Consider the following examples:

John was awarded first prize.
John won first prize.

The enemy ships are in orbit.
Our enemy’s ships hover above our world.

My mother is old.
My mother looks old.

I am young.
I feel young.

We were foolish.
We took a foolish course of action.

What will become of us?
What does the future hold for us?

Can you see a difference? More importantly, do you feel a difference?

Read the sentences out loud; do the italicized sentences have a more fluidic quality to them? In each instance, the subject becomes more active in the italicized re-write: John won first place (opposed to was awarded) or I feel young as opposed to I am young and so forth.

Can you see how the sentences morph from statements of events passed to an ‘in-the-moment’ sense of action? An important difference, especially when writing in a genre that most often demands a quick pace of action. Active voice verbs aid with characterization as well; characters that participate in their world and act to overcome the obstacles of plotting can certainly hold a reader’s attention better than characters who express themselves in the past tense, with tired and worn verbs, as if everything has already happened and no change can occur.

Hugo and Nebula Award—wining author David Gerrold is among those who have embraced transitive verbs as a way to breathe new life into old lines. In his book, Worlds of Wonder: How to Write Science Fiction and Fantasy, Gerrold dedicates a whole chapter to a discussion of a new discipline growing within the field of semantics? known as E-Prime.

The E-Prime philosophy builds on the belief that humans conceptualize the universe around them through language and that the structural relationships that exist in language translate into and even determine our interpretation of the world around us. This leads E-Prime enthusiasts to argue that the verb ‘to be’ assigns a static quality to the subject to which it is attached, thus offering a false, stagnant interpretation of reality and reinforcing the notion that things stay the same.

Yet, we know reality to be dynamic; everything, every piece of matter in our universe, no matter how large or how small, resonates with activity and exists in a constant state of flux. The world beneath your feet is moving through space at approximately eighteen thousand miles per second, and as you read this article, you continue aging-- your hair, nails, skin cells, all growing, always changing. Even though these changes may seem imperceptible, they still occur.

This is at the heart of why the E-Prime disciples advocate exorcising ‘to be’ verbs from our daily vocabularies as well as our writing-- our universe is an ever-changing place and it is only natural that our language should reflect this.

But, if we rise to the challenge and alter the structure of the language that we employ telling our stories from a passive-voice to that of a more active-voice, I believe it can only serve to draw the reader through to the conclusion by making them more of an active-participant rather than a passive-observer.

And participants, like editors, turn the page much more often than observers.

Examine your own latest piece of writing-- scan it for the most common ‘to be’ verbs listed above. Search for other ways of phrasing and expressing your thoughts as you re-read those lines. You probably will not be able to change every offending passage containing a passive verb, nor should you.

But, if you find that rejecting the passive voice forces you to find another way of telling your story, a way that throws open the door even wider to not only invite the reader in, but rather invite them along, then you have taken the first step towards reinvigorating your writing with transitive verbs.

Egan made his point by simply opening a book of Samuel Beckett (at random!) to find lively prose, invigorated with life-giving transitive verbs, void of the pit-falls of worn out verbs and sleepy language (just as an experiment, I tried the same thing-- and yes it does work every time with Beckett!).

Obviously, Samuel Beckett mastered the English language. Perhaps he did so by mastering the way he looked at the world, as an exciting, vibrant place constantly changing before his eyes.

Beckett’s writing reflects the view of a participant, not an observer.

Take time to notice these seemingly imperceptible changes, participate, and practice making your writing a reflection of the living world around you.

Works cited:

The Death of Metaphor, by Desmond Egan, Kavanagh Press, 1990.

Worlds of Wonder: How to Write Science Fiction and Fantasy, by David Gerrold, Writer’s Digest Books, 2001.